TV: The Top 25 from the last 365 Days Part 2

I only had a top 15 last year, but managed to discuss at least another 20. See the full posting here for last year and here for the year before.

Only nine of those shows are back for honouring this year. So let's get on with it and present the second ten of our Top 25.

#20 - The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency (British)

Jill Scott is a star. Not just a great singer, she's sensational as the lead actress in this charming BBC import set in Botswana. The American Scott is completely believable as Precious Ramotswe, the proprietor of the first and best ladies' detective agency in the small country of Botswana. It's also the only ladies' detective agency, a fact not lost on Mme. Ramotswe.

She's ably assisted by the rod-straight Mme. Makutsi, played with admirable stiff upper lip by Anika Noni Rose. She's the complete counterpoint to Scott's Ramotswe and a key part of what makes this show work. She's not a caricature, as we see behind her veil of privacy to moments spent with her ailing brother Richard. He has Aids and is dying, as are too many Africans. Add in Ramotswe's would-be beau, played with stoicism by Lucian Msamati, and you have a little group of people who go around solving problems and mysteries.

It's all very ... gentle. Mysteries unfold slowly and sometimes surprisingly. The case of the man missing after a baptism ceremony certainly had a surprising conclusion. That was the outstanding wpisode of the first season. On the other hand, solving the burglars at the mall where the agency is located took a tad too long.

What makes the show special, beyond the three actors mentioned, is the scenery and the music. It was shot completely in Botswana and features a lot of African music. It all makes for a pleasant time. Author Alexander McCall Smith surely has to be pleased with how his books have been translated to the small screen.

#19 - Doctor Who (British)

Really, there are only two specials to talk about in the preceding 12 months. But that's enough to place Doctor Who on the list and in the Top 20 for this year.

The last two Christmas specials have been crackerjack entertainment in the Doctor Who series. They had to be, after the completely disappointing decision to afford David Tennant some time off to do other projects and turn 2009 into a series of Doctor Who Specials. This past Christmas' entry was The Next Doctor and it was spectacularly humanistic. David Morrissey is the next Doctor of the title and he and Tennant's current Doctor meet during a Christmas in the Victorian age. We all know that Tennant's Tenth Doctor will eventually regenerate into a newer version of himself. Could this steampunk version Morrissey purports to be, be one of his future selves? That's the central issue of the special, which also involves the dire threat of the Cybermen.

In between fighting off the latest attempt by the Cybermen to take over Earth, Tennant's Doctor resolves the mysteries of Morrissey's Doctor. And it's heart-breaking and yet inspiring at the end. A truly great Doctor Who Christmas Special.

The first of the Tennnant 2009 Specials in the spring saw ex-Bionic Woman Michelle Ryan join the good Doctor in The Planet of the Dead. Ryan plays Lady Christina De Souza, cat burglar extraordinaire. While making her escape from her last purloining outing, she, the Doctor and a bus-load of interesting characters end up on a planet far, far away. A dead planet, with no life, save for the visitors on the bus and a stranded starship not too far away. It's a predicament made worse by a horde of mechanical thingies that want to keep the planet free of biological life ... and get through to the next planet to denude of life in the same way. That planet's Earth, of course.

The action and the solutions weren't out of this world, so to speak. But I really liked Ryan's bounce back performance after the dreadful turn as Jaime Summers and I'd welcome her back as a future Doctor companion ... or frenemy. She looks quite fetching in a catsuit, by the way.

About three hours isn't much to claim to be a series. But Russel T Davies has gifted us with as much Doctor Who as Tennant will allow. And that's adequate. Tennant is the best Doctor of all time (I've recently watched some Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker shows. It's true). We'll take what we can get and be happy about it.

#18 - My Boys [#12 LY]

I did a mini-review of this show back in June of last year. See it here. Nothing much has changed in the show since then, beyond Jordana Spiro's character PJ now dating Bobby, played by Kyle Howard. PJ is still girl-next-door sexy and still a Chicago sportswriter (Enough right there to recommend the show). The scoobies are still fun, with PJ's brother, played by Jim Gaffigan, consistently one of the funniest guys on TV. It's just a pleasant half-hour to look forward too. Would it be on the list without the sports angle? Maybe not, there are other good-looking women on TV doing comedies (See Fey, Tina and Marshall, Paula). But the whole melange just works. It comes and goes in eight episode mini-seasons and is always welcome here.

#17 - Cranky Geeks

No, the show is not a biographical look at my life. If that was the case, it would be called The Cranky Geek. And no, you didn't miss this show on your TV. It's an INTERNET show!

Every Wednesday night or Thursday morning, I dutifully go to www.crankygeeks.com and download the WMV version of the weekly show about what's going on in the computer world. Hosted by John C. Dvorak and Sebastian Rupley (both of whom are connected to PCMag), the cranks have two well-connected people in the industry on each week to talk about what's going on in the news.

Dvorak is a sort of love-him, hate-him kind of guy. Some in the industry dismiss him. Others follow his every word. He's always making predictions and they can either inform or entertain and occasionally do both. I'm one who enjoys what he says, but I take a lot of what comes out of his many media appearances with a grain of salt. Besides writing for several websites, he does a daily five-minute audio show, has a couple of him-versus-?? webcasts and does this show too. He's certainly not media shy.

But the opinions are mostly informed on this show and that's always good. If you are interested in computers, hard to do wrong by downloading this show.

#16 - Stargate: Atlantis [#8 LY]

I don't watch much live TV other than sports. But Stargate: Atlantis came closest to this mark over the years. It was rare for me to wait longer than a day after, before loading up the show to watch. And that remained true, through this past season, its last. Yes, yet another cancelled show on my list.

The reason for the drop in the rankings this year was simple. The end was coming and everybody on the show knew it. The story arcs were short and sometimes not too sweet. Shutouts to characters past were numerous. It was all a case of winding down.

Right as Robert Picardo joined the team as the new commander. Woolsey, Picardo's character, had been around the Stargate universe for a long time. His officious antithesis of previous commanders Col. Samantha Carter and Dr. Elizabeth Weir worked. And worked well. The scene where he goes off to slip out of a spacesuit into something more comfortable and then shows up in a suit and tie, is one of the funniest throwaway scenes. Ever. And I was a big fan of the humanizing effect love had on David Hewlett's Dr. Rodney McKay. Plus, I thought the pairing of Jewel Staite's Dr. Keller and Jason Mamoa's Ronon was delightful. Joe Flanigan continued to be the very best at being the heroic quipster, Col. John Sheppard.

But a show on a limited life span just never has the energy a bright, positive, forward-looking show has. Stargate: Atlantis was good, just not as good as the previous year's version.

#15 - Being Erica (Canadian)

Last year, CBC hit with The Border and it almost made the Top 15 of Summer 2008. Well, the CBC came right back this past fall and launched a show that charmed the shoes right off me. Being Erica was a chicklit delight, with a smattering of science fictiony time travel thrown in.

Starring as Erica was Erin Karpluk, who's irresistably charming in real life and on this show. Erica doesn't have an easy life, mostly through her own wrong choices over the years. She's been afraid of confrontation and standing up for herself. So, just about everybody in her life treats her dreadfully, blaming their own behaviour on Erica most times? She's more or less a doormat, when she encounters a most-strange Psychiatrist/Shaman played with vigour by Michael Riley. Riley's Dr. Tom seems available just behind any door Erica might want to open. He spouts quotes like a Bartlett's come to life and he can send Erica back into her past.

And here's where the show gets shady. She can and does make small changes. Just nothing major. Especially when it comes to the tragic death of her beloved elder brother some years back. Turns out said brother isn't quite the saint Erica makes him out to be, but that's fitting with the rest of the family. Her adulterous rabbi of a father, her shrewish mother and her little sister with the big chip on her shoulder. She deals with them down through the ages, again and again. All leading to the dreadul moment, the fire that killed brother Leo. Her traipsing through time to that moment leads to a shocker of an ending to the first season.

Riley is spectacularly good on this show (He BETTER be back for season two). Karpluk is a revelation, even though I'd seen her on Godiva's in a not too dissimilar role. It'll be tough to roll the same ideas through a second season. We've seen most of the ugly sides of her immediate family. And the folks at job at a publishing company would be hard to make use out of the time travel gimmick. But if the shocking cliff-hanger has some legs, we might just spend time in a parallel universe this coming year.

#14 - Carla Cametti, PD (Australian)

This is an Italian private detective show set in Australia. Makes for an interesting mix. Carla, played with sultry heat by Diana Glenn, has family issues. One of her uncles is obviously connected, a fact that her chef father, played by Alfredo Malabello knows and tries to ignore. He's busy running the family restaurant with Carla's mom (Dina Panozzo) and trying to get the family together for family meals.

It's not all smooth sailing, especially with copper Luciano Gandolfi (Vince Colosimo) looking to put the uncle behind bars AND make the moves on Carla. Add in Carla's best friend, the bed-hopping Lisa Testro (Nicole da Silva) and her dad Joe the Don (Tony Poli) and things get complicated.

The series took an episode or two to sort out who's who and who's bad and who's good. But once up to speed, this was a delightful romp through the culinary underbelly of Melbourne. Nothing Sopranos-like, but entertaining throughout. The episode where poppa Leo wants desperately to get a birthday present for his beautiful Angela was a highlight.

#13 - The Zoo (British)

Okay, I'm a sucker for zoo shows. I'd put a dozen here at this spot if I could. And, although I hate the transitional music with a passion, I am totally in love with this British show that mostly features the goings on at the Colchester Zoo. Konnie Huq has taken over quite well as presenter from Jayne Horrocks and guides us through the various life and death and birth stories that populate any good zoo. And Colchester is a good one.

If you like animals, this a great show. If you can do without seeing cute little cheetahs and other babies and not ocassionally feel sad over the passing of Scorch the Bear, then pass this by.

Enough said.

#12 - Real Time with Bill Maher [#4 LY]

You have to give Bill Maher credit. He lost the source of immense comedic material when George Bush finally left to the sound of one hand clapping. Uber dunce Sara Palin didn't replace him. All Bill was left with was a President with little to make fun of.

What was he to do?

As it turns out, still run a pretty smart political discussion each weak and take potshots at the President and the gang of tax-avoiding Democrats he's surrounded himself with. That's the job of a comedian. Attack the top and try to do their bit to reign in anybody who gets too big for their britches. I think Maher's been as funny as he's ever been this year, despite the losses of his comedic foils. The foibles of the 'good' guys, while not so frequent, still occur often enough to amuse. And it's not like the Republicans have gone away permanently. They just visit Argentina on secret hiking trips to the mistress' house.

Smarmy and sometime preachy, and with a PETA agenda I disagree with, Maher isn't everybody's cup of tea. But he works for me.

#11 - House [#1 LY]

It was the top of the heap last year. It had only one way to go. And down it went. It just couldn't maintain a crazy level of excellence that saw House run his own reality show, voting off prospective team members each week, while setting the course for destruction that cost his best friend's girlfriend her life when all was said and done. A remarkable year. This past season? Not so remarkable.

Hugh Laurie continues to shine as the emotionally and physically crippled Dr. House. Sometimes, he's so good, you just think they should cast the Emmy trophy in his image and be done with it. From the dalliance with a detective (wish we'd seen more of Michael Weston as private eye Lucas Douglas) to his romantic pas de deux with Lisa Edelstein's Dr. Cuddy, House was the best thing in the show.

The problem this year was the loss of focus amongst the rest. The old team was around in greater amounts this year, with the on-off-on wedding between Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) and Chase (Jesse Spencer) taking away from the new team. The relationship between Thirteen (Olivia Wilde) and Foreman (Omar Epps) had its moments. And certainly, the shocking exit by Kal Penn was as devastating as advertised. Just poorly fore-shadowed.

But the reason I think House faltered this year was the lack of on-screen time for Robert Sean Leonard's Wilson. It was understandable that he'd withdraw from House after the death of of Amber (Annie Dudek reprised the character as a personal ghost, to great effect). It's just that his leavening presence on the show went AWOL. It's not like Wilson is any paragon of mental stability himself. But he served as yin to House's yang in the past. And without that guiding influence, House went completely off the rails.

Into the loony bin. Which is where season six will start in the fall. I hope that phase doesn't last long. He's got some new and old team members to get back to. And a top ten to re-enter.

Tomorrow: I hope, the most entertaining shows of the last year. As I saw them.

SOFTWARE: Scratching that NoScript Itch

One of the reasons Firefox is so superior to Internet Explorer is the presence of the must add-on, NoScript. In essence, what NoScript does is turn off java for any site you visit, until you explicitly tell it to allow java from the various contributing parts of the site you are looking at.

It might come as a shock, but most sites host OTHER sites running java, as well as any little java applet they're using for their own purposes. Mostly, these other sites are things like google analytics and double click and other tracking sites. In other case, it might be links through to You Tube and the such. And occasionally, they are links to bad, bad, bad sites. That's how you get drive-by infections. It's not like you are GOING to the bad, bad, bad sites. It's just that those sites are hiding in behind places you think should be perfectly safe.

NoScript stops that. Cold. It's a bit of a nuisance to whitelist sites as you go along, but if you confine your trips to regularly-visited sites that you have already whitelisted, there is no impact whatsoever. And you'll appreciate the protection when travelling elsewhere, the first time you hear of a friend who traveled without the protection. heh, heh, heh.

At any rate, the itch with NoScript is the frequent updates ALWAYS creating the need to show you a web-page with the details ... which mostly, you DON'T CARE ABOUT. It's like a car. As long as it runs, who cares how it runs.

Finally, the good people at GHacks has a solution to the window popping up after an update. You can find the full details here. Basically, type about:config into the url box. Search for noscript.first and then double click on the true value and turn it false. Close the tab, reboot Firefox and Bob's your uncle. That's it in a nutshell, you really SHOULD read the whole article with its various warnings and explanations.

TV: The Top 25 from the last 365 Days Part 1

My birthday is Saturday and that means the beginning of reading week. So, I better get the top 25 TV shows I enjoyed in the last year over and done with. Today I present shows #25-21.

#25 - The Unit

The first of six canceled shows on the list (and I'm not sure of the future of two more, plus a ninth is not running a regular show this calendar year), so it hasn't been a great year for me. The Unit beat out Gary Unmarried for the last slot on the list. I chronicled why Gary Unmarried was worthy of watching earlier.

Dennis Haysbert is the reason this show ran as long as it did, and should have run longer. He was completely central in an ensemble cast and dominated every scene he was in. From Now and Then to 24 to this show, Haysbert is the black face of TV. A commanding presence. The problem with The Unit this year was the failure to follow up on a fabulously great season opener. The conspiracy did weave its way through the remainder, but in unbelievable ways. The evacuation of the ladies and their subsequent spying duties was the dull edge of an otherwise sharp series. That first episode brought in Bridget (Nicole Steinwedell) as the first female unit member and then discarded her save for an unsavoury set-up rape attempt.

But all griping aside, The Unit was gripping almost all of the time. Sad to see it go.

#24 - Reaper

Another dead-on-describe show. It was generally not as fresh as last year's rookie season and couldn't build enough of a fan-base to merit continuation. Didn't help coming on as a spring replacement show with only 13 episodes. But it didn't do what Chuck did, which was to explore interesting new avenues. Lead Brett Harrison just never seemed to grow on me. And a little bit of Tyler Labine goes a long way. And there was a LOT of Labine in this show.

On the other hand, a couple of characters continued to shine. Ray Wise is the perfect Devil. He's ruined the role for all time for all other actors. And Missy Peregrym had some nice turns in year two, ending with her decision to sell her soul to the Devil in exchange for a failed attempt by Sam to succeed at breaking free of the contract his parents assigned him to.

But the real fun this year were the 'other' girlfriends. Eriko Tamura was hilarious and sexy as Sock's sister/girlfriend (don't ask). And Jenny Wade was a revelation as Ben's girl, Nina the Demon. Wade played sweet and murderous, sometimes in the same scene. She and Wise were the reasons Reaper made it onto the list. Simple as that.

#23 - Friday Night Lights

Less football, more home lives from hell. It was what I was hoping for. And getting it more or less sent the show tumbling off the Top 20 for me. Still, Connie Britton and Kyle Chandler can do wrong as far as I'm concerned. So, the show lingers on in memory, favourably.

Adrianne Palicki's Tyra wore me out with her Cash-fixation. Coming off last year's dalliance with Landry (played with aplomb by Jesse Plemons), I was hoping for better from Tyra. I understood it and didn't, all at the same time. The late season return to what I wanted turns out to be an exit strategy for Palicki. So, no happily ever afters.

Exiting included seeing Gaius Charles' character moving on, meaning no more Smash-ing performances. That left the show awfully white. And that's not right. But I assume that will be fixed in season four.

Picking little moments here and there aren't difficult, starting with Tami's realization that a lot of her school's money troubles were directly the result of the money spent (squandered?) on her husband's football team. It wouldn't be the last of the money trouble moments, both professionally and privately. Matt's handling of the McCoy Challenge jumped around, but our hero met the challenge and conquered it. Sometimes Matt Saracen'd lot in life imitated that of a beaten dog, but he always seems to overcome that hanged-dog look.

One last thing though, I continue to hate Aimee Teegarden's Julie. Will forever, I suppose.

#22 -- Smallville

Almost no Lana Lang and this show can't crack the Top 20? Seems soooooo wrong, since, like everybody else, I've been wishing Kristin Kreuk's Lana off the show for a few years now.

It didn't change the dynamic. Sure, there were a LOT of little insider moments. The Legion of Super Heroes, changing in a telephone booth (inside The Daily Planet, but still!), the return of Kara (aka Supergirl), the viable threat of Doomsday, Zatanna, Maxima and the death of a major character in the final episode, especially since it was a 'name' in the comic books. The death, of course, being a great misdirection.

But Tom Welling's Clark Kent didn't get far enough with Lois Lane (played by Canuck Erica Durance) and enough with calling the show Smallville. Should come back next year as Metropolis, but won't. The solutions to problems seemed less well thought out and more blah. And too much attention was spent on Oliver Queen, the Green Arrow. Nothing against Justin Hartley, but there's a reason why the Arrow wasn't a major player in Metropolis over the years. He's just bland compared to Superman and that's why he's off on the west coast with his bride, Black Canary.

And lastly, the Lex Luthor replacement, Tess Mercer, as played by Cassidy Freeman, was all over the map. Mercer could never settle in as a good girl or a bad girl and her motivations for switching in-stream weren't all that well founded. Wished she'd grown from good to bad, or the reverse. The switching back and forth wasn't intelligible.

One more season? Okay. But it better end with Mrs. Clark Kent, if you know what I mean.

#21 - Corner Gas

And this makes three canceled shows of the five. It's placing here might be a Lifetime Achievement Award, but it really did earn consideration for tomorrow's list of #20-11. It had a GREAT final season, proving Brent Butt's desire of going out on a creative high actually happened.

This show was Canadiana right through the core. Gentle jibes at everything seemed fitting. Nothing was too cutting, nothing too innocuous to throw up there and see if humour could be found. And frequently, it was. We are going to miss the residents of Dog River.

Hank, played by Fred Ewanuick, had his best season of the series. He was constantly presenting himself as a comedic dupe, often at the hands of Wanda (Nancy Robertson). Her wandering through his mind was a highlight during the great password-guessing show. There was less nasty in Wanda this year (Robertson married Butt, and Butt and the writers toned down Wanda's nasty meter a fair bit). And that made her character fit in even more perfectly with the rest of the cast. Good decision.

I had one friend decry the final show as nothing happening. OF COURSE nothing happened. Sure, we spent the whole episode assuming Brent's character Brent would go off to the big city to become a comedian, but Brent LeRoy is forever doomed to sit around the Corner Gas station reading a comic book. It was ever thus. And, to Butt's credit, he remained true to the little understated comedy he created.

Tomorrow: Assuming I survive my trip to the dentis in an hour's time, shows 20-11. Then we wrap it up on Friday, just in time to turn off the TV and start turning pages.

SOFTWARE: The Choice in Browsers

There is but one choice to trust right now in the world of web-browsers for the Windows operating system. Firefox 3.0.11 is the choice for now. The just-released Firefox 3.5 has a whopper of a security hole and I'm waiting for the release of 3.5.1 before I switch.

Truth be told, there are some nits with the new version that would have me holding off anyways. Super-important add-ons Line Marker and NoSquint don't work with the newest version. And Tab Mix Plus pretty well locked up the test machine with the test version of itself in Firefox 3.5 (admittedly, it looks like the old combo of All-in-One Sidebar and Open Tabs Relative now seem to work, making Tab Mix Plus sort of ... unnecessary). But NoSquint is an absolute necessity, and I won't switch until a new version is ready for the latest Firefox.

Now, for those of you using the always insecure Internet Explorer, there are three, count 'em THREE, security potholes that the fine folks at Microsoft have NO IDEA how to fix. Well, that's not true, they suggest you turn off key features of Internet Explorer, lest you end up victimized by 0ne of the many nasty little sites on the internet. And that includes some legit sites you might want to visit, thanks to the insidious frames bug that let's the bad guys overlay invisible sites overtop of the legit ones you think you are looking at (and clicking on). All in all, if you use Internet Explorer, for gawd sakes STOP!

You can temporary patches for the three current stinkeroos for I.E. A good wrap-up article by Michael Horowitz can be found at the ComputerWorld site here. You can directly load the Microsoft msi files to patch your system there.

SPORTS: Halladay And Why He Can't Be Traded

Roy Halladay is something rare in today's sports world. A man worthy of being lionized and called a hero by his fans. Does a LOT of stuff behind the scenes (both he and his wife) that a lot of people don't know about. And when in the spotlight, there's no better pitcher in all of baseball. A great guy.

And a future ex-Toronto Blue Jay.

If Paul Beeston is one-tenth as smart as he is, he won't let his lame duck. truth-challenged GM, JP Ricciardi trade Halladay. Oh, it would be great to see Halladay get his chance at the post-season this year, rather than waiting for next. And I'm excited about some of the talent being bruited about as future Blue Jays. But Beeston simply cannot let Ricciardi screw up one more time going out the door. He will be fired at season's end when Beeston hands the presidential reins over to his successor. The new guy's first act will be bring in his own GM (with the blessing of the manager, Clarence Gaston). THEN, that guy, who will be more talented than the peripatetic Ricciardi at the art of the trade, will sift through the offers and move Halladay.

Bluntly, Ricciardi has shown a penchant for acquiring utility men and back-end of the rotation guys and relievers. His eye has been quite blurry otherwise. And the 'talent' in the Blue Jay pipeline has me asking some questions. Afterall, we've heard about catcher JP Arencibia, first-baseman David Cooper and shortstop Justin Jackson, to go along with the talented Travis Snider. He had a good September last year, but otherwise, Snider's had a tough time since the spring of 2008 living up to his rep. Injuries have certainly played a part. There are other non-pitchers we've heard about, like catcher Brian Jerolman, third-sacker Kevin Ahrens and second-basemen Scott Campbell and Brad Emaus. But their names NEVER make the top 100 listings from independent rating services like Baseball America. So let's consider Arencibia, Jackson and Cooper. (I'll leave out the almost complete dearth of outfield prospects to speak of. It's too obvious after Snider was replaced by, first, failed shortstop Russ Adams, then by no-hitting David Delluci).

What are the Blue Jays apparently after in the coming Halladay swap? A shortstop for sure (Mr. Jackson, you are no longer needed. Dismissed!). Any credit Ricciardi gets for Marco Scutaro's breakout season should be tempered by the efforts Ricciardi made ALL LAST WINTER to find a different starting shortstop. All the credit goes to Scutaro and Gaston (who blows the semi-credit for playing the stellar utility man into the ground. But that's another post). Oh, and the Jays would like any of a number of catchers included in deals with several teams. (Mr. Arencibia, you won't be needed quite yet. If ever.) And some of the prospects the Jays find most enticing play the same spot that has been reserved for Mr. Cooper. (Sit down. Everybody. Your talent has been evaluated and found wanting).

Ricciardi has done some good things. He signed Scott Downs to a good contract and he dumped completely useless Troy Glaus (injuries, not talent nor desire, but the outcome is dismal just the same) for very useful, but overpaid Scott Rolen. The Scutaro and McDonald acquisitions were solid. He showed a willingness to forgive and forget (which I admit I wouldn't have) to bring in Rod Barajas. And he's fouled up just everything else he's done to some degree. The managers, the contracts, the non-contracts, the lying, the pig-headed drafting of college kids because that's what the book said, the brash attitude ticking off fans and ballplayers alike ... the list goes on. You'd have thought his ability to forgive and forget with Barajas might have extended to, say Orlando Hudson, merely an all-star on every other team he's played for. Break your word to him, but never call him a pimp. Otherwise, you end up on the next trade out of town.

Since Beeston has not been able to emplace his replacement as of yet, it's not logical to name a new GM. The new guy will want that task for himself. So the Toronto Blue Jays and their fans (remember, I cheer for the Twins these days) have to stumble along with the stumblebum who has authored this roster of over and under-achievers none of whom are worried about kids coming from the minors to take their jobs. If Ricciardi gets the chance at one more mistake going out the door, the Blue Jays are doomed to the mediocrity Ricciardi has institutionalized into the team.

That's why Roy Halladay will wear the horrible black Blue Jay uniform until year's end. My guess, a Christmas gift of a trade to the National League will follow the arrival of the new GM by mere days. By that time I will have rejoined the Blue Jay fan flock and will be sorry Roy's going.

At least I hope that's what happens.

SPORTS: A Ceremony for the Ages

I haven't died. Been busy. But not too busy to miss the opening ceremonies of tonight's Major League Baseball All-Star Game. SPECTACULAR! And yes, my eyes misted, just like everybody else. That's why I know I'm still alive.

BOOKS: Sitting, Soaking and Reading

I love to read. In bed. In a good chair. At the dining table. While standing in queues. And in the bathtub.

But the latter requires good old-fashioned pulp between two covers. I will not take my precious electronic book reader, my outdated Sony Clie, into that most horrid of all environments for an electrical device. It's not out of fear for my own safety. I doubt I could fry much more than a nerve or two by dropping it into the drink. I'm fearful for my Clie, which they don't make anymore.

Books can get awkward to handle no matter where you read them. Some are heavy. Some are bound such that you have to constantly shift the book to read into what should be a much larger uncluttered gutter. And mastering one-handed page-turning is a task all children should master. Alas, I didn't. At least for bigger books.

That's why I like the feather-light Clie. I can read at a consistent 50 pages an hour with it. Bookmarking is not an issue. I turn off the Clie. I turn it on. I am right at the place I left the book. I can read in the dark and this past weekend's mini heat wave reminded me that my little 7-watt reading light STILL gives off SOME heat, however little. It's nice to sit in the dark and stare at this little screen and continue on my little adventure wherever else my reading takes me. And, if I go overboard and turn the reading session into a marathon, the battery limitations of the device force me to take a break before becoming permanently zombified.

The Clie also works with either hand, preventing the cramp that most people envision having with electronic readers. That's good, because I shift around a lot when reading. I squirm. I'm not proud of it, but sometimes it's the only exercise I get all day.

I've basically run the Clie into the ground once before (It's also my personal digital assistant, holding the usual contact info and a game or two, while also being a database keeper of things like passwords, lists of gifts given and my current book wants). It actually fell into disuse for about three months. But I finally replaced the battery and have since gone back to having five hour reading sessions, if I want to.

Which I do, except for in the bathtub.

There will be a time when I can't breathe life back into the Clie. When that time comes, I will be faced with better choices than what I have today. Sony has a book reader that's so-so from what I hear. Amazon, of course, markets the Kindle. Version 2 of the device came out recently and it's hailed as another step on the road to ubiquitousness for electronic book readers. Too expensive by a factor or two, the Kindle is still too pricey to give my mother as a present. And I love my mother a lot. It's even too expensive for me to buy as a toy (purchase in Canada being a whole other issue).

But there will come a time, say version 5, where a Kindle might just be good enough to replace my trusty old Clie. That's when we will see if it can survive a little water damage.

SPORTS: Florida Roundball Writers FULL of Hot Air ... and Other Stuff

While the folks in Miami are but a pale comparison to the idiot writers in Orlando, there's something in the Floridian water supply that reduces most, if not all, of the basketball writers in that state to simpletons when it comes to suggesting any and all pro basketball players want to come to their fine state. Regardless of how stupid those projections are.

The latest to wind me up is the usually intelligent Ira Winderman. who wrote yesterday about Chris Bosh and setting up the J.O./CB4 reunion tour this fall in Miami. Won't happen. As much as homer writers want it to be, it won't happen.

Let's discuss why, for the slow students on the keyboards down there. Winderman dismisses the possibility that Bosh will re-up THIS summer with the Raptors. In fact, re-upping this year with the Raptors could net Bosh as much as 30 Million dollars (of the US variety) more than waiting for the summer of 2010. Let's do the math. Bosh already gets about a $18M bonus for staying with his original team on a seven year deal with bigger annual increases than the six year deal awaiting next summer, if he moves on. Secondly, there is a recession and the salary cap, and it's kissin' cousin, the luxury tax threshold, will be down significantly in 2010. So the financial experts tell me. Having two $20M players on the same team means a lot of D-Leaguers sitting in uniforms at the end of the bench. THEN, there's the chance the new collective bargaining agreement is going to reduce pay and pay opportunities even more. How about limiting contracts to four or five years? How about making the pay difference a WHOLE LOT BIGGER for jumping rather than staying? How about a LOWER percentage of revenue for the players? How about a strike, stopping payment completely?

It's not hard to see Bosh, happy where he's at, taking the money.

Now, let's talk teams. Does he want to join Miami this coming season? Not on a bet. He's tried playing with O'Neal. It didn't take. So, he joins Miami NEXT year. Well, he won't be joining them coming off a full season with Toronto. He'll have been traded by then. But let's say he wants to build that fabulous house down the street from Vince and Tiger and whoever else has a lot sitting open beside them. He joins Wade and .... who? Beasley? Sorta plays Bosh's position, doesn't he? A bunch of wannabe's and never-were's? Please! He'd be lonesome for Calderon and Bargnani before November was half over.

If he's going to hook up for less money with anybody that has title aspirations, it's going to be LeBron James or the West Coast Smirk with the Lakers. Otherwise, he's going to be money-hungry.

And, as we've already stated, money makes Toronto look awfully good. Heck, this is the city that reserved judgement after the story came out about him being a deadbeat dad. Turns out that wasn't true. Imagine the reaction to the original story had he been in New York, Chicago, Los Angeles or even Miami. It's not that the press is acquiescent in Toronto, it's just that most of the media up here wait until getting all of the facts.

Furthermore, Toronto does have a chance at being better than Miami. Starting with the first game of this coming season. It was all about the health with the Raptors this year. Sure, Bosh himself is no healthy mule. But it's a better bet that Calderon, Bargnani and Marion's replacement will stay healthier than O'Neal. And Wade's a warrior. And warriors get hurt.

As for the crap that Colangelo likes Beasley, I'll bet an unnamed source told Winderman that. Colangelo never says anything more than platitudes to anybody who could go running to the press or to the commish. Man's a one-man three-letter organization when it comes to telling secrets. The story that Bosh requested a trade was utterly bogus.

In all of the time that the Floridian media has been cracking about Toronto Raptors fleeing the northern climes for the sunny south, TWO Raptors have broken hearts by turning down Toronto contracts. Mike James did the Raptors a favour by taking his me-first game on the road to Houston (and a bunch of other teams since). And Tracy McGrady left for Orlando. How'd that work out for ya' Orlando?

Raptor money is just as green as anybody else's in the NBA. Money talks. Bosh has a good situation in Toronto, with a good salary, a coach he likes, decent teammates that move up a notch when healthy and a place in the top circles of Toronto society. If it wasn't for the odd bit of snow and bad seasons when everything breaks badly, it would be perfect.

And Miami is far from perfect now. And in the future. No matter what the 'journalists' think and write. And dream.

TV: The Comments I Get ...

I've mentioned this before, but I don't actually believe anybody reads what I write. I do this to vent. Sometimes to document, so that I can look it up rather than shuffling through my voluminous paper notebooks. Sometimes to say I told ya so. Sometimes because I've come across something so wonderful, I have to tell the world. Which basically boils down to me. Since I don't expect people to spend a lot of time reading my long-winded posts.

But, every now and then, I get comments from people who DO read the blog posting of the day. And would you believe I had TWO, count 'em, TWO comments on the posting from earlier today! One was from a rabid follower of Reaper, pointing me to fan support sites for the show. I did, in fact, check out the petition sites and Kristen's ongoing Save One Show project. The only problem I had with the former is that I couldn't seem to find the actual petition to add my e-signature to. The latter project limits me to just one show and I have to disappoint my correspondent by admitting I voted for Chuck. In the battle of the put-upon nerdy guys, I like the one hooking up with Yvonne Strahovski and Jordana Brewster. Sorry, but that's the way it is.

The other reply came from somebody I'd bet large money on that works with the folks that make Gary Unmarried (which strikes a chord with this unmarried Gary for obvious reasons). Nothing wrong with that. In fact, he shared the good news that renewal is looking more possible. And that IS good news.

Gary Unmarried stars Jay Mohr, the modern day Don Rickles, and Paula Marshall. I've been a fan of Marshall since the first time I saw her, which was in a cop's uniform, I think. Quickly followed up by a bikini. She's been my definition of TV sexy for a lot of years. We've sort of grown up together. But her mere presence on the TV screen has spelled doom and gloom for any series I like with her in it. I wailed when she got up close and personal with Veronica Mars' father in one of many TV shows she's 'cursed.' It was soon dead, too.

That said, she's easy on the eyes, plays smart and every, I mean EVERY, producer in town thinks he or she or they will be the ones to break her curse and have her at the head of a long-running show. So she gets chance after chance and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Speaking of playing smart, Kathryn Newton is the brainy little Louise Brooks (Wonder how they came up with THAT name?). She's sort of a younger version of Macey Cruthird, curly hair and all, who was the best thing on Hope and Faith. Anybody who wouldn't want Louise amongst their offspring is a dope. And the producers of Gary Unmarried didn't fall into the obvious trap of having Louise's brother Tom, played by Ryan Malgarini, be a dunce. He's physically klutzy, but has a wit about him, usually with self-deprecating focus on himself.

Like I said, it's a charming comedy that produces grins and a few outright laughs. I sort of miss Jaime King but that was off-set by ditching Ed Begley, Jr., who just didn't seem to fit, other than to be Gary's reverse image. It's not appointment TV, but would fit into the Monday night line-up in place of Rules of Engagement, which will probably be the axed show to give Gary Unmarried renewed life.

As an aside, Rules of Engagement has worth, if only as a showcase for the always funny Patrick Warburton (who always plays Patrick Warburton in any TV show he's on). But any show that continues network TV's seriously-wrong love affair with David Spade is almost beyond redemption.

At any rate, I wish that anonymous poster good luck in getting his show renewed. It'll rate as good news.

TV: Just WHAT Are the TV Execs Thinking?

USA Today has the Early Fall Line out for the various major American TV networks and it contains few, if any surprises. Unfortunately, a lot of decision-makers are having a tough time separating the quality from the crap to bring back in September.

My top twenty list for the 2008-2009 season is already shaping up badly. I could lose as many as three shows that still have life in them. NBC's Chuck, CW's Reaper and NBC's Life are worthy of continued life. Yet the USA Today site basically puts Chuck on the bubble and consigns Reaper and Life to the unhappily ever after. I've already gotten used to the idea of losing Stargate: Atlantis, Kyle XY and The Middleman. Adding Reaper and Chuck REALLY adds insult to injury. And Life should be saved somehow, if only to resolve the coming romantic triangle between the three main characters.

But I know it won't happen. Life's Donal Logue is already headed for a biker show. Ty Labine's bouncing from Reaper to another show. That leaves Chuck with some semblance of a chance to come back. Here's hoping.

As for the other bubble shows I'd like to teeter over into the saved column, CBS leads with The Unit and Gary Unmarried (yet another Paula Marshall show. She's the sexiest series-killer on TV. Ever. And the most successful.) And I've grown to appreciate ABC's Castle. I'm all in favour of smart kids and there's at least one on each of the three shows I've just mentioned here. That's rare enough to preserve. These shows aren't in the top twenty for the season, but they ARE consistently entertaining. And more real in their fictionality than all the reality shows, save for the Amazing Race.

Save These Shows. Chuck, The Unit, Gary Unmarried and Castle. (And suggest NBC do the production sharing on Life that worked so well for Friday Night Lights and Law and Order: Criminal Intent). Please!!!!

SPORTS: My NBA Picks

I didn't bother posting the picks because the whole NBA playoff is just a month-long exercise in setting up the Los Angeles Lakers-Cleveland Cavaliers final. Does ANYBODY out there seriously think that won't be the case?

Thought not.

I did think the minnows would cause the faves some grief in the first round in the East. Boston's a pretender without Garnett and the hurting shooters in Orlando makes the Magic less wonderful. Win or lose, it doesn't matter. Cleveland crushes them all. And the Lakers will do the same out West. Who cares who loses to them.

The final? The Lakers. Kobe and LeBron off-set, although I think the battle will be entertaining. And Kobe will defend LeBron better than LeBron will defend Kobe. And the rest of L.A. is better than the rest of Cleveland. Six games, with the West Coast Smirk winning on his home court.

Blehhhhh! I can hope for a King James coronation all I want, but it ain't gonna happen. Unless somebody puts a serious hurt on The Smirk along the way. heh, heh, heh.

TV: Yes Virginia, There IS a Good Primeval Episode

And show four of the third season of ITV's Primeval IS that good episode.

Not as many dinosaurs as I would have liked, but the gigantosaurus was pretty good. Looked nasty. Chomped a goodly number of louts. Managed to survive the predations of the ARC team, which, when you think about it, is standard for the course. Best of all Bad Haircut Man, the reporter with dubious morals, and his witchy boss, both failed to make it through the episode, alive and living in the 21st century.

Actually, the best thing about the episode was no Helen Cutter, despite Juliet Aubrey being listed in the opening credits. Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

But before you take heart in that development, the writers couldn't last a week without an idiotic conspiracy. That new government flunky introduced in episode one this year, the one extra brunette we didn't need, has assumed the Helen role as conspiracist thorn in the backside of the ARC team. She's taken all the snark out of Sir James and turned it into sulk, and that doesn't make the show any better. A big part of the charm of the show is Ben Miller's snide throwaways as the stiff upper lip Sir James. Wonder if we can feed her to the mushroom people next week, although they seem to be threatening to do that to Jenny.

Lucy Brown, who's played Claudia/Jenny since the start, seems to be a bit off this year. Took me almost the whole show to figure it out. She's dressing down--jacket, shirt and jeans. No flighty frocks with a penchant for hats and a bit of upper crust upbringing showing. I thought it annoying how she'd take her frilly dress and heels into action when the intelligent and obvious thing would be to give orders from the sidelines. Turns out, I miss the girly girl. Brown looks great in anything, so I'm not complaining ... too much. Guess I can't have my cake of logic and eat it too.

The Connor-Abby-Jack triangle resolved about as obviously as it could. The only question was whether it was going to be older or younger for Jack. And I'm glad our little menagerie additions from last week made an appearance, although I wonder how they handle NOT eating their way through a house, given the hospital burrowing escapades.

All in all, I got enough dinosaurs to give it a straight thumbs up. All quibbles were minor and I'll chance the Pod People episode in a week's time. But if we don't get more dinosaurs and more logical behaviour soon, that damned need by the writers for conspiracies will surely end my watching sooner than later.

SPORTS: Burke COULD Pull It Off!

A lot of people are pooh-poohing Brian Burke's assertion he will hunt for, and find a way, to make John Tavares a Toronto Maple Leaf next year. I think he can do it.

The key to all of this is the financial straits the Tampa Bay Lightning find themselves in. I think the Maple Leafs CAN get to that second pick fairly easily. And it will be a trade that makes sense and cents for the Lightning.

Toronto deals the seventh pick, plus Tomas Kaberle and John Mitchell plus a third round pick NEXT year to the Lightning for the second pick plus Ryan Malone plus one more bad contract. This makes dollar sense to the Lightning, who might be able to purge as much as eight million in salary while taking back something close to five. And Kaberle hardly stands to stick around. He could be converted into kids without much difficulty, leaving the possibility that Tampa might very well shed upwards of six million in salary, while bringing in two to four talented kids. Even if the Lightning decides to keep Kaberle and his reasonable salary, exchanging Malone for Kaberle, then the downward drop between Victor Hedman and say Brady Schenn's not all that horrible to think about.

Okay, so now Burke's sitting over Garth Snow's shoulder whispering sweet nothings into his ear. He certainly could offer up Pavel Kubina JUST for the right to flop picks, letting the Islanders have Hedman while he takes Tavares. That gives the Isles Kubina to play in the top defensive pair until Hedman comes across the pond and develops into what I think he is, the best prospect in the draft. Plus Kubina's contract isn't forever, expiring next year. That's a trade Snow HAS to think about, since it's economically viable, improves his club RIGHT now and still leaves him with the possibility at crowing later that he got the Chris Pronger of this draft. Future third round picks (think 2012) might sweeten the pot enough.

And the Leafs simply get worse for next year, making THEM the likely front-runner for the first pick in the draft, Taylor Hall of the Windsor Spitfires. THAT'S when the club starts spending like a drunk to bring in the talent to surround Tavares and Hall and Luke Schenn. Maybe Chris Hanson, Tyler Bozek and the rest of the university free agent clan Burke's assembling will mature at the same time. Say, in about three years.

I see only one flaw in this plan. This is a six-player draft and maybe Tampa Bay isn't enamoured with Schenn the second, or any of the other possibilities here. Maybe the way requires either of the two Swedish kids sitting just behind Tavares, Hedman, Evander Kane and Matt Duchene (from my hometown Brampton Battalion). In fact, Magnus-Svensson Parvijaarvi is the real sleeper of this class. It might be that the Leafs might have to make one more trade to pop up a spot to get Tampa a sixth pick rather than a seventh. That puts Los Angeles in the cross-hairs, and the Kings need veterans who can play, rather than more kids. Would face-off artist Niklas Hagman be enough to effect a swap? Maybe with a fourth-round pick? Something like that might be in order.

With the Leafs on the trading block during Burke's draft-day shenanigans and the willingness to send contracts to the AHL (Hello, Mr. Stempniak and maybe, even you too, Mr. Blake), I could see the Leafs being REALLY, REALLY different next year. Still bad, maybe even horrible. But a plan sometimes needs retreat before an all out assault on the enemy.

And nothing suggest Burke's not a man with a plan.

SPORTS: You've Been Warned ... My Stanley Cup Predictions

Given my desultory results from the NCAA Basketball Championship Pools (My best ACTUAL finish was a tie for 72nd out of 90,000+ in the WOMEN'S bracket), you can take my predictions for the Stanley Cup playoffs with a grain of salt, aspirin or a shot of your favourite liquor. Warnings made, here we go.

I see two first-round upsides in the East quarter-finals. I think Carolina is better man for man than New Jersey right now (who knew Erik Cole and Paul Maurice were so vital to the Hurricanes?) and right now Cam Ward is in the ball park with Martin Brodeur, who might be having the downturn that happens after the initial adrenaline rush from coming back from a long-term injury. Ward's won it all before, so we aren't comparing apples to jeeps when talking Brodeur vs. Ward. The other upset I see is the Rangers over Washington, simply because I don't think Jose Theodore can do it in the crunch, whereas I'm pretty sure Henrik Lundqvist can. That cagey old Ranger squad is built for the playoffs and methinks Sean Avery vs. Alexander Ovechkin has some entertainment value. If nothing else, we'll see more than a few Capitals in the penalty box for trying to ram their fists and stick down the pest's throat.

Naturally, I would be picking a fully healthy Montreal Canadiens to upset the Big Bad Bruins of Boston, but Les Habs aren't healthy. Schneider's hurting (making Yannick Weber THE sleeper draft pick in pools) and Markov's out for the series. Even without them, I think pride, Alexei Kovalev and a good Carey Price makes Boston sweat big-time. Boston in seven.

Pittsburgh is on a roll (to the Cup) and will beat Philly.

In the semis then, Boston takes on Carolina. Hmmmm. Good series. Boston wins in seven and then has nothing left for the Penguins, who roll the Rangers in five. Pittsburgh wins the East in another five-game series.

Out west, the only thing resembling a first-round upset occurs when Calgary dispatches Chicago in a nasty seven-game series. The Flames then go on to lose to San Jose, while the second-round upset shows Vancouver ousting Detroit, who has more injuries than most people realize, to key players. Besides, Luongo vs. Osgood is not a good matchup for the defending champions.

The West final will be a doozy and it comes down to the fact that San Jose can't beat Luongo when it counts. Mats Sundin gets his reward for putting Toronto behind him and finally makes a Stanley Cup final. Good for him, and for the Sedins and especially for Luongo, who will be Canada's starting goalie at the 2010 Olympics.

As mentioned previously, Pittsburgh wins the Cup this time around, simply because Vancouver can't contain Crosby AND Malkin. Marc-Andre Fleury plays well enough in his second straight Cup final to off-set Luongo's brilliance and the Penguins hoist the cup after game six, which I THINK will be in Pittsburgh. But I could be wrong.

Or I could be wrong about the whole thing. You've been warned.

TV: We Have Comedies ... Tragically

Comedies are coming and going right now, and I have more sadness than happiness and chuckles to report.

The big news, at least here in Canada, is the conclusion to the Corner Gas emporium of laughter. Brent Butt's six-year old show goes out on a high note and will be seen 17 times a day on various Canadian cable channels. Forever. There was at least another year of Dog River hijinks left in the show, but Butt's pulled the plug early enough so that we don't see any padding. Good decision creatively, but it would have been nice to get a few more shows. Ah well.

A trio of recently-released American comedies, show that our neighbours down south have lost most of their comedic muscle. Surviving Suburbia is awful. Beyond awful. Even worse than In the Motherhood. Only slightly better than Roommates. For every guffaw in each of these three shows, there's at least one equivalent cringe-worthy moment. At gunpoint, I might watch Suburbia, because Bob Saget's character does ring a little true with me, being a curmudgeonly old coot myself. But I'd seriously consider telling my torturers whatever they wanted to make the viewing stop. As for the 'baby' inspired In the Motherhood and the Young Adult Friends ripoff that is Roommates, well death appeals. The worst thing about Roommates is that its one of the shows the ABC Family Channel decided was better for broadcasting than The Middleman (sobbing sounds start and continue for three minutes) and the just-cancelled Kyle XY (sobbing at the thought of a 10-episode final season to make way for this trash goes on for a minute). The programmer who made THAT decision hates the viewing public waaaaay worse than any Al Qaeda cleric.

Before closing on these sad notes, I should mention not all is tragic in the world of sitcoms. TNT's charming My Boys is back. Jordano Spiro is lust-inspiring and the scoobie gang has had some cute moments so far. The clunker cliffhanger from last year was resolved quickly and left behind. It's not bend-over funny, but it creates a half-hour of grins and smiles.

And I had a chance to catch New Zealand's Diplomatic Immunity and laughed. A lot. It would translate to Canadian TV in a heart beat. It involves an imaginary island nation in the Pacific and its consulate in New Zealand. The spit-of-sand nation basically lives by subsisting on handouts from New Zealand. And let's say the consular staff is more interested in a good life for them, than for their countrymen. The NZ government sends in a 'controller' type to oversea the wastrel spending by the foreigners. And from there, the laughs grow. Lots of women in skimpy native outfits (bikinis) don't hurt. The Canuck version would probably run a riff on those French islands in the Gulf of St. Lawrence. But I wouldn't mind suddenly adopting a bunch of Polynesian islanders from somewhere in the South Pacific.

Say, close to New Zealand?

COMPUTERS: I've Decided to Get a Harvard Education

A little late in life, I've decided to get myself a Harvard education.

This from a guy who flitted around the educational universe post high school. I did time at Ryerson Polytech (now Ryerson University) and Sheridan College and have a credit or three from York University. In addition, I contributed to a textbook used at McMaster University. Through it all, I maintained my classification as an unedu-ma-cated (sic) bum. And now, I plan to add Harvard College to the list of schools I learned something from.

And never graduated from.

Okay, the reality is that I have found a most fascinating website. http://cs50.tv is the site set up to allow the downloading of the full course load for Harvard's Computer Science 50: Introduction to Computer Science I. Every lecture is taped and made available, as are the course notes (compiled by teaching assistants so the students can concentrate on what the professor is saying, instead of scribbling down pearls of wisdom). The problem sets AND quizzes used by David Malan are downloadable, as are the slides he uses during the lecture. It's wonderful. (WARNING: The full set of files runs to about six gigabytes of download)

The course teaches computer basics and then dives right into programming, unfortunately using C, a language only a masochist could love. Luckily, Malan doesn't just jump from 'This is a computer' to debugging C. He at least bridges the gap with an object programming language called Scratch that resembles more a build-it-with-Tinker-Toy-Objects language than an actual programming language. In MY day (I am very old), that pseudo language for getting novices up and running was Turtle, as new programmers learned the art of moving a triangle about a screen. THEN, we moved to Fortran, the C of its time. Thank god for the arrival of Basic while I was STILL in high school!

I find Malan entertaining AND informative. He was a PoliSci major before becoming entranced with programming and his enthusiasm shows all these years later. He loves the 'art' of programming and he passes along that passion from the week's worth of lectures I've seen.

This course is available to any Harvard student, from frosh to fifth-year senior (or even more tenured) or web-surfer who can chance upon it. So, it's fitting for most any teenager and above who is curious about computer programming. Without having gone through all 32 hour-long lectures, I can't promise that it remains viable for a pre-college student. But Malan does go from baby steps to something approaching running in the three hours I HAVE seen. He certainly DOES talk fast. And I can follow him. I think MOST high school kids with an aptitude and an enthusiasm for the subject COULD keep up.

I'm going to get through the whole course. Might take me longer than the allotted 13 weeks a Harvard scholar would have to finish it in. But then again, I never claimed to BE a Harvard Scholar.

Maybe later!

SPORTS: The Pull Up Jumper

Having watched Andrea Bargnani improve so much over the last three months, I'm struck that the biggest key to the Toronto Raptor's improvement might very well be his new-found ability to pull up on the drive and hoist up a pretty deadly 10-footer.

Look around the NBA. It's not the most common capability out there. Often, players just continue the drive and get called for charging. Others, including Bargnani as recently as the fall, would stop and then throw up some wild under-handed scoop shot ... when not continuing on into the offensive foul. And others still, have perfected the clank, as their shot turns into a slingshot boomeranging into the backcourt. Like I said, it's a talent.

It also made me think back to my days covering high school basketball in town. The best coaches at the time were Gerry Thompson at my alma mater, Bramalea, and Sandy Roland, who bopped around, but came to the forefront at Central Peel. I won't settle the arguement as to who was best. Even in their 70's, I would expect a spirited battle from the one whom I didn't choose. Suffice it to say, both were very good coaches. (I didn't play for Thompson. Doug Patterson was senior coach during my time at BSS. And Patterson's biggest compliment to a player was, "Good hit!" He was a former semi-pro football player [G])

But I wonder if maybe I'm overlooking the man who might have been the actual best coach in town. Al Brown, the principal at J.A. Turner also coached girls' basketball. His squads frequently were in the girls' finals and they weren't always the most athletic team in the division. One of his drills that seemed silly at the time, now makes more sense through the lens of time. He'd have his lay-up line almost never do lay-ups. Instead, the girl would run pell-mell for a spot on the lane just a couple of feet in front of the foul line. Then she'd jump straight up and hoist up a jump shot. Once in a while, they'd actually practice with a player holding a broom stick if they were about to play a team with a tall centre. The girls subsequently made a LOT of those shots come game time. And they didn't get called for charging all that often. He might have been as polite a guy as was ever born, but Brown proved gentlemen made good coaches too. (Again, not to suggest Roland and Thompson weren't gentlemen, they were just a little more competitively demonstrative, if you know what I mean).

We don't see the pull-up jumper on the run all that often anymore. Just like the old-fashioned hook shot, as compared to the running hook in vogue today. It's all dunks (layups for the girls) and three-point shots. Some of these other skills, like making short jump shots without charging, are seemingly forgotten.

Guess it takes an old coot like me to remember when doing like Bargnani's been doing, wasn't all that remarkable.

TV: Primeval ... Continuing to Suck ... Me In?

I'll hate myself for doing it, but I think there's a light at the end of the current Primeval sucks period. This week's third episode of the third season is clearly a turning point. At least I hope it is. Please!!!

About half of this week episode continues the clueless suckitude that has permeated the first two episodes of this, the probable last season. On the other hand, a return of the dinos was also front and centre, the kind of stuff that made the first season of the show so fondly remembered. A little humour leavened that part of the show, with cute little "ratty chipmunk beaver" kind of things making their way through just about any part of the hospital that they wanted. A couple even outlasted the anomaly's cessation, to join the little brood of prehistoric fauna Connor and Abby seem to be building. The nominal baddie of that part of the show, a reporter with the worst haircut almost ever, was more nuisance than bad dude The coming attractions suggest he becomes more involved next week.

Back to the just plain bad stuff about the episode. Helen Cutter, uber-baddie for two and a bit seasons, becomes almost righteous at her finish line. Mind you, unlike the other character that ends up prostrate on the pavement with a bullet hole to emphasize escape to the hereafter, we don't actually see Helen's corpse. Please, Please, Please let her be dead and gone from this show. Her rationalization for all the mean-spirited acts she's pulled in the past (literally and figuratively) means bupkus to me. IF she genuinely thinks Nick Cutter is the author of future disaster, she should have killed him off, from a distance, someplace more easily accessible than the ARC. Instead, she inveigles him to solve an artifact mystery. When he refuses, she doesn't shoot him. She arranges to blow up the ARC ... with her still in it.

Come on!

On the other hand, if we are now rid of Helen Cutter, I will accept the absurdity with a straight face and chalk it up as one of the lesser stupidities perpetrated this week, Which brings me to my other pet peeve. Clones. Especially the insta-grow kind.

I will accept clones. Physically-similar replicas, minus any environmentally-caused changes over the years. A clone of me wouldn't have the residual problems my fractured shoulder have caused me over the years. A clone of me might not resemble Alfred Hitchcock unless the doctors growing the clone decided to feed it my not-so-smart diet. Most importantly, my clone would NOT have my memories, unless it turns out we store our memories in every cell in our body. Complete copies. Clone stories are usually really bad science, once you get past the conceit of clones existing at all. I hate all stories dealing with clones, with very, very few exceptions.

And this episode isn't one of them.

There IS an effort to deal with my major hates dealing with clones. It's just not all that believable, even within the context of a science fiction show. The clone in the show, at least the newest one, must have taken some time to grow. Helen could have left if to grow and come back 20 (40?) years later to pick up the fully-developed plaything without having actually LIVED those decades. She COULD have popped in, in the morning, to see what Nick was looking like, before going back and fashioning her pet idiot identically, except the clothes were wrong. And with her break-in capabilities shown last week, why would haircut and two-day old beard be easier to reproduce than filching/buying exactly the same clothes? And of course, the speech patterns, while that of an idiot, are enough to fool Laila AND Jenny. Surrrrre. THIS is why I hate clones.

So, how come I haven't pulled the plug on my fatal attraction to Primeval? Again, the coming attractions promises what brought me to the show in the first place. Dinosaurs. Big ones and small ones. Raptors next week aplenty. A change in cast is also imminent, as we gain the cop from episode two to cover the spot left open by this week's death.

Maybe that bright light at the end of the tunnel is my future-self just smiling brightly.

TV: Kvetching for Primeval's Sake

A smart man knows when enough is enough. One little trailer and I'm not going to be smart enough to pull the plug on Primeval, the once-great, now-lousy series from Britain's ITV.

After a lousy, credibility-forsaken kick off to the third season last week, I wasn't exactly looking forward to this week's episode. For good reason. It looked like what it was, a low-cost, logically-flawed horror movie masquerading as an hour-long episode of a TV show. If it wasn't for a trailer that promises something interesting next week, this would have been my last dalliance with a show headed for the chopping block.

According to Rich Johnston's Lying in the Gutters column for CBR, the show won't survive the recession. This will the final series. I would have said, "Too bad," as recently as the end of last year's flawed second series. The memories of that superior first season still lingered and there were enough good episodes in series two to hold out hope. And forgive me my silly delusional optimism, but the coming attractions section at the end of the wasted hour this week gives me hope of one good show before the series dies. (And I've ordered Dan Abnett's series-related book, so it's not like I hate EVERYTHING about the show).

But this week's show continues the trend to think visually, rather than logically. At least the writers understand the idiocy of what they are doing. While Professor Cutter tries to construct a three-dimensional model of his theory of anomalies, at least Jenny has the good sense to mouth the obvious, "Could we have done it on the computer?" The answer is nonsense. Cutter has a Eureka moment pushing rods indiscrimanately into the model and ascertains an anomaly will open up nearby, "It could happen tomorrow, it could happen many years from now?" You thinking he might get lucky and have it open today? Yeah, I thought so.

So off to the haunted house we go. Ooops, by 'we,' I mean Connor, Abby and Jenny. No soldier backup (too expensive to pay the extras). Connor and Abby don't even go spelunking with guns drawn. It's a HAUNTED HOUSE, for heaven's sakes! Best thing about haunted houses? You don't have to show the haunter much ... which is REAL good for the bottom line. And please, the little girl 'zookeeper' with the penchant for quickly scaling trees!?!? Absurd, but in keeping with the spirit of the rest of this brain-dead hour.

The B story in the episode is the continuing jihad Helen Cutter, Nick's ex-wife, has against the good professor and his associates. She sends in the clone, to no good effect, and later steals into, and then out of, Nick's house. Clumsily. This is SUCH a tired story. I do NOT CARE about Helen any more. And I don't care if we ever get a conclusion to the Jenny/Claudia thing, either. Jenny's about to make her move on Nick anyway, so Claudia's return isn't all that necessary any more.

If not for the trailer, I would be convinced that the series had turned into a monster of the week show, with maybe, maybe not having the monster actually show up. The one little toothy chameleon cum batman that hung around this week didn't interest me much. I know the show was originally a dinosaur (era nasty) of the week to begin with, but dinsoaurs interest me, demonic beasts don't. It's like the difference between Animal Planet and Supernatural. Different shows for different people.

The new direction sure feels like it won't have much travel THROUGH the anomaly to speak of. So it's up to the minimal use of creatures coming through it, the overuse of Helen and her cloned sidekicks (and don't think the ending of this week's show is anything BUT a way to get a Nick clone into play), and few if any soldier extras.

Nope, this is a show hurtling towards the curve in the road and nobody seems to be steering it.

SPORTS: This and That ...

ALLAN IVERSON: I never was a fan. He never seemed to catch on to the notion that the people signing his cheques were his REAL team, not the personal posse of boyz from the 'hood he surrounded himself with. He's really just a punk and a convicted thug down deep, and that's all. Sure, you had to admire the way he threw his little body around during all those years in Philly. He was entertaining in a lot of ways. But Iverson never has been a winner, never will be a winner and any team signing him next year is an instant candidate for oblivion. I personally believe he could dunkirk the Lakers, Celtics or Cavaliers if they foolishly brought him on for an inexpensive run for the ring, he's that toxic. His sniffing dismissal of the Pistons' request to come off the bench ("I'd rather retire than come off the bench") wasn't followed by, "And I'll give up the rest of the money they owe me." The mere act of dumping Iverson on Detroit makes the Denver manager this year's version of Danny Ainge. And to think, if the NBA hadn't had that asinine rule preventing the Raptors and the Grizzlies from having the first pick in the draft for the first few years of their existence, Iverson would have been a Toronto Raptor, rather than second pick Marcus Camby. (Toronto actually WON the lottery that year, but slid down one spot due to the STUPIDEST RULE EVER INVENTED). Maybe I should be thanking David Stern for small favours about small-minded jerks.

MINNESOTA TWINS: Picked to win the Central Division by Sports Illustrated. Oh NOOOOOOOO! Curses. Specifically, the Sports Illustrated Curse. Well, at least they aren't on the cover. We can only hope the Twins' kiddie korps on the bump will all mature a bit and be better than last year, when they were pretty good. Some good health from Joe Maurer and my favourite AL team has a chance to beat SI ... and the rest of the central.

NHL, A FORTNIGHT FROM THE PLAYOFFS: They had me worried for a bit. But not now. Alexei Kovalev seems to have the eye of the tiger back and the kids in the net are all right. Again. That means Montreal won't be anybody's patsy in the Eastern Division playoffs. Sure, those early departures for Andrei Markov and Mathieu Schneider tonight in the romp over the Lousy Leafs is cause for concern. But the win just about punches the club's ticket for the post-season follies. I almost hope they finish eighth and get the big bad Bruins in the first round. Hee, Hee, Hee. You watch, the bottom half of the bracket is going to do QUITE WELL in the quarters.

SORRY: I believed in the Big East. And if you believed in me, then you thought Louisville and Pitt would be throwing down Monday night. But I DID mention that North Carolina with a healthy Ty Lawson might be the best team in the country. If you were smart and respectful of the UNC training staff, then you latched onto that one statement and are enjoying everything. And everything WILL include hoisting the trophy Monday night. Michigan State's had a good run, but ...

MOVIES: My Favourite 20th Century Movies, The List

Well, yesterday completed the month and completed my list of my favourite movies of the twentieth century. I listed 31 favourites and as many, if not more, honourable mentions. Naturally, there were some oversights (amongst the honourable mentions, not my top 31 list). Maybe another time. Say in 2050, when I go over my favourite movies of the last half-century. Hope I'm still around.

What does my list say about me? It doesn't include such acclaimed classics as The Godfather, Chinatown and Schindler's List. I'm just not into drama as something to come back to time and time again. It doesn't include such SF icons as Bladerunner, E.T. or any of the Star Trek movies (remember, Lord of the Rings came out too late for this list). The first two mentioned didn't work for me and the only Star Trek movie I ever enjoyed start to finish was the fourth one. And it wasn't much more than an extended version of the weekly show. So, I'm fussy about the ideas behind my SF shows. I have Cleopatra in the list, but not Ben Hur or Lawrence of Arabia. I believe I explained that by starting the blog entry about Cleopatra with, "Elizabeth Taylor." Spectacles all, but only one boasted the most beautiful woman in the world, excepting my mom, of course. As far as babes are concerned, especially naked ones, there aren't many on this list. It's not like I'm against Halle Berry dropping her top, but that's not going to get a movie into the list of flicks I will stop what I'm doing and watch again, when surfing the channels.

Nope, I like my movies to have grins, chuckles and a few outright laughs. Oddly enough, comedies aren't exactly in great supply in the list, but almost all of the movies have moments of genuine mirth in them. And action. And cleverness about the plotting of the various characters. And some great music. And moments surrounding the movie that make my viewing of them worth remembering for.

That's why I call this list My Favourites. Not The BEST. Not The GREATEST. Just My FAVOURITES. Here's a list in order, with links to the entries. Hope you enjoyed the ride!

• MOVIES: #1 North To Alaska
• MOVIES: #2 Electric Dreams
• MOVIES: #3 Local Hero
• MOVIES: #4 Jaws
• MOVIES: #5 Star Wars IV- A New Hope
• MOVIES: #6 The Paper Chase
• MOVIES: #7 Bridge On The River Kwai
• MOVIES: #8 My Cousin Vinny
• MOVIES: #9 Die Hard I
• MOVIES: #10 Cleopatra
• MOVIES: #11 The Magnificent Seven
• MOVIES: #12 The Dirty Dozen
• MOVIES: #13 Jurassic Park
• MOVIES: #14 Aladdin
• MOVIES: #15 Ferris Bueller's Day Off
• MOVIES: #16 Harry In Your Pocket
• MOVIES: #17 Speed
• MOVIES: #18 Gambit
• MOVIES: #19 The Great Escape
• MOVIES: #20 Beverly Hills Cop I
• MOVIES: #21 Ice Station Zebra
• MOVIES: #22 Titanic
• MOVIES: #23 Out of Sight
• MOVIES: #24 Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
• MOVIES: #25 Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
• MOVIES: #26 If A Man Answers
• MOVIES: #27 The Coca-Cola Kid
• MOVIES: #28 Romancing the Stone
• MOVIES: #29 The April Fools
• MOVIES: #30 Children of A Lesser God
• MOVIES: #31 Genghis Khan